Tuesday, December 18, 2007

On Feeling Welcome in their Group: So I can pray or seek guidance or friendship from them without feeling pressured to be a Baha'i

Her heart is touched. -gw

I am still in a good mood. I may be tired and in dire need of a nap, but I don't feel miserable. Sometimes I can still feel that feeling creeping around the cornors of this not-so-familiar bliss that i'm feeling, but I am not going to let it invade the bubble i'm in right now.

I had a great time last night. Even going to walmart with JB, oak and behi'a (however you spell it) was an adventure. I don't think I stopped laughing the entire time. (And that was just getting shampoo/condi , cat food for JB and some throw pillows and rugs for Oak.) We are a bunch of silly people.

And the devotional. I don't even know what to say. I think it was the longest amount of time i'd ever been quiet in my life. There was so much to take in, and I really just wanted to know more. oak cooked some spagetti with some sauce that wasn't tomatoey at all, but realllllly spicey. I had to get a bajillion white noodles and put a ton of parmesan cheese on it so that my mouth wasn't completely burnt. IT was sweet tasting, and yummy. Too bad i just have a mild stomach. Otherwise I would have torn into it. (SOOO much better than cafeteria food) and then Oak made some yummy chocolate chip cookies. Maybe next time I go i'll bake.

I'm definitely going back. I have some material to read about the Baha'i faith, and i think over christmas break I'm going to get serious about learning all I can. I think I miss having faith, but the good thing is.. it's based on intellect and self-searching... so even if i'm not going to be a Baha'i, they accept you as you are. And I am welcome in their group. SO I can pray or seek guidance or friendship from them without feeling pressured to be a Baha'i and I can gain just as much spiritual growth from that as I want.

And even if i just use it for meditation purposes, and friendship. I haven't felt so calm in a long time. Everyone is so friendly. and smart. and loving. I miss feeling like i have a place.

I love that they advocate change, and equality and social action. I love that they are involved and love children and want to give back as much as they can tot he community. I love that they want more for their brothers , sisters , mothers, fathers and neighbors more than they want for themselves. this rings true for me. the concepts at least. I don't know what I believe as far as god goes, but I do believe that spiritual enlightenment must come from you. It's a personal journey. all religion is.

I dont know, i have a million thoughts.

I pose the question, if a person born and raised in NY, living in the south , going to a private liberal arts methodist school can come to the same conclusion as a man who comes from a completely different background, as well as a woman from a foreign background, and a man from another pLANET it seems... can all come to the same conclusion about life.. then what does that mean? (these conclusions were reached seperately) There must be some inherent truth to the conclusions made. This supports a universal truth.

i want to know about that. what is truth? what is THE truth? how do you know the difference? Is there one? is it all mankind? are we really supposed to be figuring these things for our own? Do we really have a purpose? Does anything have a purpose? Does it matter what we do and what lifepath we take? are we predestined to do the things we do? What about free will? I have so many questions...

Bubblesanangel, "Wow," Diana's Piece of Mind, or what's left of it

{Re-posted with permission}


John Penberthy said...

You're on the right path. You've got a lot of questions; keep going. Eventually you'll find that a lot is mind fodder and that ultimately it's not so complicated. The Dalai Lama puts it nicely: "There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophies. Our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness." John www.tobeebook.com

Anonymous said...

Thanks so much John! You're right, but to over think things is such a human trait :). Trusting my own feelings is definitely something I struggle with. Love the quote. :)