On an Apendectomy and Habitual Optimism: I regret that some heartless jokes of mine had made him laugh

This is moving. -gw

I was a little bit nervous, yes I was - before I left work to visit Brian, who was hospitalized in Xiehe after appendix surgery (Appendectomy, to be medically more precise). It'd been almost a year (if not more) since last time I got to see him when attended one of his studying circles of Baha'i belief. He had always been a source of encouragement and to some extent comfort to me and to a whole lot of other people. Hard to imagine he'd act out a patient yet he did, painfully.

He struggled in pajamas to sit up when I entered the top-class room he stayed. It hurt me shockingly that he could barely move or laugh or basically do anything that usually pleases him (basketball, for an instance).

He said I was being squeenish and I argued I wasn't at all. I'd take the pain or suffering easily if those had fallen upon my own self but I am incapable of witnessing the others' misery while having no remedy to help.

He said he had prayed to take some of his friends' suffering and God - in his own words - replied to his altruistic wish. He joked about becoming fully aware of women's greatness of giving birth (dude...a baby out from vagina plus nine months in pregnancy in comparison with teeny weeny appendix from belly with one clear cut, I don't think so - but yeah I got his point).

In response to his habitual optimism I did nothing but remained speechless, so bewildered as touched. I regret now that some heartless jokes of mine had made him laugh and consequently in sharp pain. (Ouch)

But it was as usual great to see him and listen to his high-spirited words of a devoted missioner. Thus I was sad and happy, at his suffering and our re-encounter in life.

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